Women is...: Be a Better Flirt

Be a Better Flirt

Beyond the things we do subconsciously to send signals to the opposite sex, what can we do consciously to attract potential partners? The FlirtZone is an actual "flirting academy" in London, England, that offers workshops on how to flirt effectively. Its founder, Peta Heskell, offers the following flirting tips for women on the Zone's web site:

* Give clear signals. Men are notorious for misinterpreting signals from women. Make sure your flirting conveys the message you want it to (i.e., separate sexual flirting from friendly flirting).

* Wear something eye-catching. If you want someone to approach you, it's much easier if you're wearing a conversation-starter (i.e., a fun hat, a crazy pin).

* Feel good about yourself. Positivity is contagious. When you flirt, feel good about yourself and others will feel good about you.

* Separate yourself from friends. In general, men find women much more approachable when they are by themselves. This lessens the chance that he'll be rejected in front of an audience.

* Check your voice. In Peta's own words: "Does your voice sound like a dental drill or do you wash people in waves of sensual sound?"

* If you aren't interested, be polite about it. It takes a lot of courage to approach someone so be sure to turn him down in a way that you would appreciate being turned down yourself.

* Be interesting by being interested. Flatter him by showing genuine interest in who he is � ask lots of open-ended questions. It will also tell him that you need a little more information before giving him your number.

* Ask him what he enjoys doing. It's easy to rely on the good old opener, "So what do you do?" but, for some men, it translates into "How much do you make?" Because men are more activity-oriented than women, asking them what they enjoy doing will tell you more about what makes them tick.

* Only give out your real phone number. If you decide to share this information, only give him the real thing or give nothing at all. Again, it takes a lot of guts to ask for a number so treat him the way you would like to be treated.

* Make the first move. Peta says that 95 percent of the men she's talked to would love to be approached by a woman. Chalk it up to another step forward for women's equality.

* Be yourself. Be proud of who you are. Pretending to be someone you are not won't get you very far in a relationship.