Women is...: Second Marriage: Making it Work

Second Marriage: Making it Work

Susan Wilkins-Hubley thought her marriage would be ideal. Sure, her husband was divorced with kids, he still saw his ex-wife almost daily at work and the new couple was moving into the dream home he and the ex had built together. She also had her own son from a previous common-law relationship. Her dreams of perfection quickly faded. She felt stressed, anxious, and worried about her own sanity.

"I was wondering if I was nuts," she recalled. "I had nothing to compare this to." Starved for sympathetic ears in an isolated, small town in Nova Scotia, Canada, Wilkins-Hubley launched the Second Wives Club Web site (www.secondwivesclub.com) to chat with others and share relationship, legal, and financial information. The overwhelmingly popular site now keeps Wilkins-Hubley busy full-time.

It�s no surprise second wives look to each other for support. Exes, stepchildren, custody, and finances make every day an uphill journey for these women. The difficulty of their task is borne out in sad statistics: 60 per cent of second marriages fail, compared to 50 per cent of first marriages.

But many second marriages do survive�� and many thrive�� not just despite the obstacles, but because of them. The challenges can make a couple stronger and closer and can even turn them into better people for the experience.